Blur

                   One day just seems to blur into the next....get up......get through the day.....chase sleep for a couple of hours.....stare at a screen or a ceiling for the rest of night till morning breaks.... get up....get through the day etc. etc. Most of the time I really have to concentrate to determine what day of the week it is. Usually grab cell to see what month/date it is. Thankfully, I can keep up with the year. I am not alone in this blur, we are all pretty much living this way. We are physically exhausted. Mentally, we are skipping on one cylinder and dead missing on other three. But this is life and we hunt funnies to placate to blur. We laugh at the stupidest things sometimes but it keeps the one cylinder skipping along. I was always taught to do my best no matter what the task giving me was, you know "anything worth doing is worth doing well." I have tried to simplify my personal self and space to help eliminate the amount of disappointments I incur. Expect nothing then at least I am not blindsided, as much. People are going to do what they want, how they want, when they want regardless of what cost it is to those around them. I am no different. I am the most selfish person I know. I want what I want when I want it and pout like a child when I am told no you can't have that or no you'll have to wait. It's a good thing I hardly ever ask for anything , when I do getting told no is a true blow that hurts immensely.  But I guess we all see everyone else as getting to live life as they want except us. Go where they want when they anytime they want. But such is this life. Just gotta keep keepin on.
                                  Just thinking out loud for all the world to see........