Words can't express the depth of grief that is felt. The feelings are mixed with numbness. It all seems so surreal. Waking up from this dismal nightmare would offer a margin of relief, but then realization that sleep was never present gives way to the fact that this IS all real and actually happening. This sadness is void of tears. It is filled with bitterness of a road already traveled. It is slowly consuming but it is ever present like an elephant in the room. This immense weight is devastating. We are all carrying a part of it and yet we are all stumbling under its load. How to move forward without offending others involved? How to move forward while leaving part of us behind? Faith is faltering, not in God, in flesh. Resentment bubbling just below the surface. Anger, incredible raging anger. Anger that has no outlet. Anger that threatens to destroy. But sadness makes its presence felt deeper than any other emotion. Blackness beckons. The necessities of life distract temporary but then remembrance. Hollow emptiness. Emptiness of loss. Loss of presence.
" Blessed,blessed are the thieves who stole my masks......... And I have found freedom of loneliness and the safety from being understood..." Kahlil Gibran
Just thinking out loud for all the world to see...............
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