Really??????????

                             The world can be a heart wrenching place. Just when you think things are sorta calm, the bottom falls out and there's nothing you can do but free-fall till you crash! We all deal with grief in our own ways, some find solace in a bottle,others shut down, still others pretend everything is rosy. Having been blindsided by the latest turn of events in my little world, I am still free-falling. Hope the crash is cushioned but that is doubtful. More likely a gigantic thud! accompanied by the sounds of breaking bones, maybe I'll land on my head and finally get some sense knocked into me. Morbid, I know but I have to find my humor where I can. I am no tower of strength. I am the one most consider undependable, funny the different ways people see us and how we see ourselves. I feel I have no self-confidence, I have been told by more than one person that I come across as extremely self-assured and very confident. A long time ago,I picked up the habit of  "owning it", stand up straight,chin up, chest out and walk with purpose, you know like you own the room. Guess I've gotten pretty good at it. It helps you blend in with whatever crowd your in at that moment too.The right clothes help one pull this off too. Doesn't have to be designer threads, well not ones you paid full price for anyway.(I love the thrift stores, name brands at cheap prices! and unique selections too.)But things that even a self-conscious person know is flattering to them. Doesn't have to be the latest fashion or even trendy. But there is great truth in the looking good and feeling good. If its ten years old and well out of fashion but you look like a million bucks in it, your presence is gonna show it, most of the time. Our skin is a different story. Feeling comfortable in one's own skin. That sometimes can take alot of practice or more often than not a GREAT acting job. People who don't know you are clueless as to what makes you, You. Always remember, behind the smiling happy faces you see everyday, are lives that you know nothing about. Most of us keep our sadness well vested around casual acquaintances and even around people we know on a more personal basis, only those closet to our hearts see our real-selves and even they do not know us completely. Always pray for the people you see in passing as well as the ones you talk to everyday, prayer gives strength , even if we are unaware we are being prayed for.
                              Just thinking ou loud for all the world to see...........